I once had a distant relative, whose exact relationship to me is unclear. His name was Nate Malaprop-Spooner. The best I can figure, Nate was the great uncle of my third-cousin-twice-removed’s brother-in-law’s stepmother’s half sister’s godmother’stunt double. Nate is remembered around the clan for his genius at butchering the English language in brilliantly creative ways. If there were a Guiness world record category for breaking the most rules of English grammer simultaneously, Nate would definitely be in unchallenged first place.
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