June 8 -  Wacky Tips
The Carefree Gourmet - by Joyce McCombs

It’s time once again for the semi annual Clearance of Joyce’s Desk, and I’m happy to report that I have some wacky kitchen tips and a few strange culinary facts to pass along. Hopefully these little gems will now clutter up YOUR desk, while I can toss the frighteningly large pile of post it notes I’ve been moving around for six months in the trash.

I don’t go looking for these things, but they seem to find me anyway. There’ll be a small line at the bottom of some magazine article that catches my eye and I have to rip it out so I don’t forget it. Or maybe one of my favorite chefs on the Food Network will do something so smart and handy that I scribble it down and toss it on my desk where it’ll lurk for a couple of months. Once in a while someone will say something to me at the store, like the nice lady (sorry I don’t know who you are!) who told me she always her bread basket with a piece of foil because it keeps her garlic bread warmer longer. This is MY kind of kitchen tip! You don’t have to rush out and buy something or build a dang gadget, or worst of all crochet or sew something to make it work. So with those stern requirements in mind, here are a few things I found interesting in the past six months.

One pound of apples is equal to 2 large, 3 medium or 4 small. If you’re making an apple pie and get them peeled and chopped and they seem a little dry, cover with apple juice and refrigerate for 30 minutes to perk them up. And if you’re going to bake apples for dessert, try placing them in buttered muffin tins so they hold their shape.

For the most tender and flakey biscuits try using cold or even frozen butter or margarine. If you have a food processor, that’s the fastest way to cut the butter into the dry ingredients until the dough has 1/4” crumbs - just be sure you don’t over mix it or it will become tough. An empty soup can makes a fine biscuit cutter. If you want crisp tops, brush them with water. If prefer soft tops, brush with milk or butter.
When you’re baking a cake in a tube pan, cover the tube part with a small paper cup or a piece of foil and when you’re pouring the batter it’ll keep your counter tidy.

When you have to light several candles and you don’t have a long handled match, use a piece of dry spaghetti or a wooden kabob skewer.

Before making fudge, line the pan with well buttered heavy duty foil, making sure you have lots of extra foil to use as a handle to lift the candy out when it’s cool.

Adding a cup of milk to the cooking water will keep cauliflower white and sweetens the vegetable as well. Use the cooking water later as a flavorful soup base.

Cellophane noodles (also called bean threads, glass noodles and Chinese vermicelli) are made from the starch of mung beans. To add them to soups, you don’t even have to presoak them - just toss in before serving and they’ll be soft and ready to eat in about 30 seconds. To use them in stir fries, soak them in hot water for 30 seconds, drain well and toss into the wok.

To speed chill champagne (or any beverage you want cold in a hurry) submerge the bottle in a bucket of half ice, half water. It works faster than ice alone. If the bucket is shallow, turn the bottle upside down the last five minutes to make sure the entire contents become chilled.

You can’t talk about champagne without mentioning caviar and it’s good to know it will keep unopened in the coldest part of your refrigerator for up to a month. After that, you should slurp it up within three days, and remind the resident fishermen that it is NOT salmon bait. And if you’re adding caviar to a cooked dish, like an omelet, wait until the very end to fold it in, or you’ll break the tiny round eggs and they’ll turn mushy. A tiny baked potato with sour cream, chives and a dash of the (less expensive) black lumpfish caviar makes a truly elegant first course, in case you need to impress someone.

There’s a lot of panic in the streets these days about cheese and how to keep it fresh and what to do if it gets moldy or dried out. Some people wrap their blocks of Cheddar in cheesecloth and then dip it in vinegar or white wine or vegetable oil, but for the life of me I can’t think why. Who wants cheese that tastes like these things or becomes unbearably slimy? Other people triple wrap cheese in unbleached parchment paper and seal it with freezer tape. Often I want my cheese the same day I take it from the fridge, so this doesn’t make much sense either. I say calm down and do what you’ve always done - wrap it up in plastic if the store wrapper gets too beat up, and put it back in the meat drawer of the fridge. If it gets dry on the end, grate that part and top a casserole with it or use it to perk up a grilled cheese sandwich. If cheese gets moldy, just cut off the bad parts and a little bit more just to be sure, but don’t worry. Cheese and mold have been fast friends longer than you and I have been eating it. The one thing you probably shouldn’t do is freeze cheese, because it changes texture and often gets crumbly. You can still use it in dishes where it’s melted, though, and I promise I won’t tell on you.

Instant boxed potato flakes get a lot of bad press, but I like to keep a box around because they make a dandy crumb coating for chicken and chops. Crush them a bit in a zip top bag and add salt and pepper to taste and maybe a dash of paprika then dip and go. Boxed spuds are also handy for thickening soups and stews, especially any kind of chowder, and you don’t get that raw flour or cornstarch taste either.
Cooking spray has millions of uses but this was a new one to me. Spray your blender or food processor blades before processing sticky mixtures or grating cheese. It also works great on cookie cutters and ice cream scoops.

Here’s five ways to get rid of garlic breath. The first and most famous is to chew on fresh parsley, but I rarely have any lying around the house. Fennel seeds are hard to find, too, but apparently they work even better. I do have coffee beans at home and chewing on one for a few minutes will help neutralize your garlic fumes in no time. Two tablespoons of lemon juice in half a glass of cold water, swished and swallowed, is supposed to work, too. And according to the folks at the Gilroy Garlic Festival in California, eating lime sherbet is the best remedy of all and is quite refreshing.

To make your grapefruit juicier, use a fork to prick a whole fruit in several places and then microwave it on high for 20 seconds. Let it stand a couple minutes before eating. You can do this with oranges and lemons, too, just cut the microwave time to ten seconds or so, and roll them lightly on the counter to release the most juice.

Barbecue season is here and chances are hamburgers will be on your menu soon. For extra juicy and flavorful burgers, add 2 or 3 tablespoons beef broth or V-8 juice to every pound of meat before shaping into patties. Be sure to dampen your hands with water and the meat won’t stick to your fingers. If you decide to pan fry instead, try dusting the meat with a bit of flour or cornstarch before cooking for a crispy crust.
Ice tea is a summer staple, but keeping it cold without diluting it can be a challenge. Make a double strength batch of tea, and then turn it into mega cubes that last longer than regular ice cubes. Just fill clean yogurt containers (or any small plastic container that will fit in your ice tea jug) with the mixture and freeze. An orange slice or a couple of strawberries in each one adds a welcome bit of color and extra flavor, too.

Ice tea reminds me of lemons and there is about a cup of juice in four of them. If you find them on sale, stock up and squeeze the juice for later - it’ll keep for up to six months in the freezer. Ice cube trays hold about a tablespoon of juice and then it’s easy to pop the whole works into a zip top bag and use them as needed. The leftover lemon halves are handy for removing beet or berry stains from your fingers or you can sprinkle one with a little salt and use it to polish your stainless steel sink.

Marshmallows are easier to cut or chop when they are frozen. Use kitchen shears for better control of the slippery beasts, and dip them in water in between each snip for a clean cut. For the easiest cupcake frosting every, place one large marshmallow on each cupcake about three minutes before you take the cakes out of the oven. It will melt and form just enough frosting and taste great besides.

Peanut butter is America’s original health food. More than half the peanuts grown in the U.S. go into making peanut butter and there are more than 800 of the pulverized goobers in an 18 ounce jar. It’s healthiest if you get the natural kind without any emulsifiers or sweeteners, though I must admit I have it bad for good old Jif. To keep those natural oils mixed in, be sure to keep the jar in the fridge.

Here’s an easy peanut sauce that kids love and is great on ramen noodles: Combine in a blender or food processor: 1 cup hot chicken broth, 3/4 cup peanut butter, 3 tablespoons soy sauce, 3 tablespoons lime juice, 1 tablespoon catsup, 1 teaspoon minced garlic and a dash of powdered ginger. Blend until smooth, then taste and see if you think it needs some pepper or a pinch of cayenne - mine usually does. Toss it with the noodles, sprinkle with sesame seeds and be sure to refrigerate the leftovers because the whole works is even better cold.

When you haul the whole gang out to Quartz Lake for a picnic, keep the bees and skeeters from getting into drinks by covering cans or cups with foil and poking a straw through the foil. While you’re at it, line your portable grill or hibachi with foil before you add the charcoal and you’ll get an extra boost of heat and an easier clean up, too.

If you like to roll your pie dough between two pieces of wax paper like I do, sprinkle the counter with a few drops of water to anchor the bottom piece and roll away.

The CG Test Kitchens recently got a phone call from someone who wanted to know if I’d ever heard of carpaccio. I did know what it was, but I’ve never wanted to try the famous Italian appetizer which consists of shavings of raw beef fillet garnished with onions and capers and mustard sauce. It’s an Italian delicacy and I’m sure it’s popular in some social circles I don’t belong to. I don’t mind thinly sliced beef, but I don’t want it to moo at me from the plate. Make mine medium and pass the A-1.

Since we seem to be passing through Italy, I need to mention our good friend, Al Dente. Instead of being the name of your favorite Italian uncle, al dente actually means “to the tooth”. Pasta and vegetables cooked al dente should offer a slight resistance when bitten into, and not be too soft or overdone.
Finally, on a recent morning talk show, I watched a spirited discussion about leftovers and I got pretty cranky about the bad reputation they’re getting. You and I know that having leftovers in the fridge or tucked away in the freezer is better than money in the bank, but these fine television folks were telling the audience to toss things out after just two days or you could get food poisoning. Please. No more meatloaf sandwiches? No more Wednesday night French Dips made from the Sunday pot roast? And what about spaghetti? Does anyone ever make enough for one night? Isn’t it an unwritten rule you always make more than you’ll need and freeze the rest for a night when you’re too tired to start from scratch? You know it is!
Here’s how the discussion ended. Two lovely hostesses tossed their perfectly coiffed hair several times and discussed the merits of taking home the remains of a lobster dinner that they couldn’t finish. Should they ask for a doggie bag? It was so undignified! Could they call it a people bag without the head waiter smirking at them? Or should they just ask for take out service and is that even appropriate in a fancy restaurant? Oh dear, they sighed. What to do? Life was so complicated! All that money for the meal and it would be wasteful to leave half of it on the plate, but it’s so very awkward to juggle a container in the limo and what if the press found out?

Right there was the problem. Skipping over the fact that their dinner was probably on an expense account anyway, I came to realize that in my world, there’s no such thing as leftover lobster. On the rare occasions I’ve been lucky enough to be able to afford it, or been treated to it, I made sure I was able to do it justice. For most of us there ARE no leftover lobster problems. If there are, you forgot to invite me to dinner.

Run now, and get your scissors and clip out the good parts and pile them on your desk and be glad for me. My desk is clear! I’ll see you back here in mid July.
 

Index to Carefree Gourmet Articles

Sourdough Sensations June 29, 2007

Kitty Treats June 29, 2007

Dog Treats April 20, 2007

Sandwich Plan March 23, 2007

Carefree Wacky Ingredients March 8, 2007

Homestead Hearth January 25, 2007

Carefree Cooking 101 January 11, 2007

Holiday Punch December 23, 2006

Holiday Treats December 12, 2006

Thanksgiving II November 20, 2006

Standby Favorites October 16, 2006

Cabbage October 11, 2006

Apples September 22, 2006

Kids Cook July 6, 2006

Wacky Tips June 8, 2006

Graduation May 11, 2006

African Cuisine April 13, 2006

A Bit of Irish March 23, 2006

Crazy for Carrots March 9, 2006

February Vacation February 23, 2006

Easy Budget January 12, 2006

Christmas Treats December 22, 2005

Sweet Surprises December 8, 2005

Turkey Times  November 22, 2005

Grand Champions - Part 2 - October 13, 2005

Janet Boyer September 22, 2005

Grand Champions September 5, 2005

Blueberries  August 12, 2005

Halibut and Zukes July 28, 2005

Orange Juice July 14, 2005

Happy Birthday June 30, 2005

Honey June 9, 2005

Picnic Dishes May 26, 2005

Celebration Salads May 12, 2005

Kraft Foods April 21, 2005

Shrimp April 7, 2005

Carry on Airline snacks March 25, 2005

Sandwiches March 10, 2005

Back from Vacation February 24, 2005

Super Bowl Snack Attack  January 14, 2005

Ginger Snaps December 29, 2004

Christmas Memories - December 12, 2004

Thanksgiving November 23, 2004

Glen and Meat  October 29, 2004

Blueberry Pie Champion  September 30, 2004

Fair Winners  September 2, 2004

Glen's Knives June 11, 2004

Aunt Aggie Tells All... May 13, 2004

Crazy About Catsup April 29, 2004

Carefree Clearance Special April 8, 2004

Seattle Adventure March 26, 2004

Vegas, part 2 March 12, 2004

Vegas Wind February 12, 2004

Casserole Bonanza January 11, 2004

No Fuss Dishes  December 19, 2003

Fake and Bake Christmas  December 11, 2003